Wednesday, April 5, 2017

Concept of Notional Loss – Story of the Man who wanted to have a Heart Attack

THE MAN WHO WANTED TO HAVE A HEART ATTACK
Theory of Notional Loss
A Spoof
By
VIKRAM KARVE

One day – a man went to visit a patient in hospital.

The patient was his office colleague convalescing in hospital after heart surgery – following a massive heart attack.

Fascinated by the sophisticated and luxurious facilities in the hospital – the man asked his recuperating friend how much the heart surgery had cost him. 

“Over 5 lakhs...” the patient said.

“My God – 5 Lakhs – that’s expensive. How can you afford it...?”

“Medical Reimbursement...” the patient said.

“Medical Reimbursement...? Does that mean that you don’t have to pay any money for all this medical treatment...?”

“Of course I don’t have to pay from my own pocket – they pay everything. That is why I joined the medical health insurance scheme. All office staff are members of this scheme. You too are a member – aren’t you...? So even if you have a heart surgery  they will pay everything.”

“Really...? Is it true. If I have a heart attack right here – here and now – will they will pay for all my treatment...?” the man asked.

“Of course they will pay. You are a member of the health insurance scheme. You are entitled all medical treatment – just like me...” the patient said.

For some time – the man kept brooding.

He appeared to be in low spirits. 

Then suddenly – the man started shouting in the hospital: 

“I want to have a heart attack  I want to have a heart attack...”

Everyone was stunned by his strange behaviour. 

Doctors tried to calm him down.

But – the man kept on screaming loudly: 

“I want to have a heart attack  I want to have a heart attack... 

So – they evicted him from the hospital.

Later – when he had cooled down – his wife and his friends asked him the reason for his crazy behaviour in the hospital.

“I have lost 5 Lakh Rupees...!!!” the man said.

“You have lost 5 lakh Rupees...? Where...? How did you lose Five Lakh Rupees...?” they all asked

“I lost 5 lakh rupees worth of medical reimbursement just because I did not have a heart attack. That is why I want to have a heart attack. So I will get 5 lakh rupees for a heart surgery and medical treatment which is my entitlement...” the man said.

And then – the man started shouting again: 

“I want to have a heart attack  I want to have a heart attack...

Soon – the man became crazy. 

So – they admitted him into the psychiatric ward for treatment.

Of course  since he had gone crazy – he would receive medical reimbursement for the cost of psychiatric treatment.

So – at last  he had got pyrrhic justice.

The notional loss he had suffered because he had not had a heart attack  this notional loss would now be mitigated to some extent because he had gone crazy...! 

He wanted medical re-imbursement for cardiac treatment

Instead – he would now get medical re-imbursement for psychiatric treatment”.

Yes – he had suffered a notional loss because he did not have a heart attack.

But now – since he had gone insane – he would make good at least a part of the notional loss he had suffered – since he would be reimbursed the cost of psychiatric treatment.

Dear Reader: 

Look back on your life and tell us: 

Have you suffered such notional losses too  because you did not fully avail of all perks/facilities you were entitled to...? 

PS: To end on a lighter note – a Military Veteran who was a strict Teetotaller – who never drank alcohol in his entire life – he told me that he had suffered great notional loss – because  he had never availed of the monthly Concessional CSD Liquor Quota during his entire Military Career of 35 years – and even now  after retirement – he continues to suffer notional loss” since he does not draw his monthly Liquor Quota”. 

VIKRAM KARVE
Copyright © Vikram Karve 
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© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

Disclaimer:
1. This story is a fictional spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh. 
2. This story is a work of fictionEvents, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the story are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

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Copyright © Vikram Karve (all rights reserved)

© vikram karve., all rights reserved.

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